New mannequin at Eddie Bauer.

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Iris & Joshua go people-watching.
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New mannequin at Eddie Bauer.

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Iris & Joshua go people-watching.
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βIf you had to leave your house at a momentβs noticeβ if, for example, your house was on fireβ what would you take? Now, Iβm going go out on a limb and assume you want all the living creatures in your house to survive and that youβre going to be taking them with you. But, what possessions do you value? What are the things in your life that are so important to you that you would spend the very spare moments that you have left to collect them?β
To be honest, I donβt think Iβd remember to take much out of the house. Iβd try to wear appropriate clothing and maybe grab my wallet; if Iβm lucky Iβd grab my laptop. It has my lifeβs work on it. Mostly.
There were the wandering years: the years when mind and body wandered, looking for a home. There were those years I wrote myself into existence. I wrote, βI write, therefore I exist.β I wrote myself into history. I have gathered, in my maternal grandfatherβs old army trunk that sits by the front door, notes from the wandering years.

I do not feel as if I have sufficiently captured the breadth or depth of bound paper in this photograph. The earliest writings start in elementary school; they cease shortly after the birth of my daughter. There is a binder containing most of my slides. There is my laptop. The binders containing thousands of film negatives are not pictured: I keep them in the room where Iris was sleeping. Like a fire, I had a short amount of time to gather everything and photograph. I did not risk the back bedroom. Also not pictured are my passport and the aforementioned wallet. I like to think Iβd have the wherewithal to grab them in case of fire. I think I would.
I recently joined a photography forum called Clickin Moms. It’s a collection of professional and enthusiast photographers giving each other advice, participating in workshops, and partaking on projects. I joined the ClickMoms Project 52, which gives me a theme for each week out of the year. This week’s theme was a self portrait.
I had to wait until Iris was napping. That gives me an average of 45 minutes to the first cry, 20 minutes to the next. Then I had to figure how I was going to photograph myself amongst all the clutter of my house. There’s one good window for lighting, so I decided that instead of trying to clear everything out from in front of the window and give myself a clean background, I would put everything in front of the window and show you who I really am.
My goal as a photographer is to embrace the awkwardness of life that gives us humor. I look for lightness in life by seeking humor in humanity. I want to remember over and over again that what makes us human is love. I want to document the truth of us and show it beautiful. Wish me luck.
This is me.

Seeing as I’ve hardly taken these pants off Iris since I made them, I decided to make another pair.
On this pair, the wool is quite felted, which makes them rather waterproof and windproof.
Now Iris can stand near the front door with no fear of getting frostbite.
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I still failed to make process photos and directions.

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The frost came in
came in through the doors and windows
came in through the walls
curled its fingers βround the edges of the frames
capped screw caps white

held captive the hinges

then turned the handle of the door.
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The frost came in.

It left us lace.
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I thought I had no use for the arms of this sweater,Β but the truth is,
thick cashmere is fantastic when the weather outside lurks below zero for days on end and
all the heat from the wood stove goes out the front door.

I snipped the arms from the sweater, cut some curves here and there, added pins and stitched it up.
I ought to start taking process photos.
I ought to practice writing more precise directions.
Mom (Gramma) made the booties.
We have a house full of toys.
Iris plays in the potted plants, moving soil from one pot to another and rearranging the tiny figurines.
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Anyone want some awesome toys?
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