Sunday, December 11th, 2011

Five of Wands β€” Bruegel Tarot

Artist: Guido Zibordi Marchesi

 

Interpretation: “Ambition. Those who rise too high often fall (It’s easier for those who rise too much to fall).”

 

I learned fives as cards of conflict. While working on my own deck, I have illustrated the cards in mostly random order, depending on which card I am able to embody next. The first card I illustrated was the star, back near the end of the last millennium when I thought I was doing a majors only deck and knew nothing much about tarot. The fives are some of the last cards I have illustrated. The fact that I had such issues illustrating fives shows I have problems with conflict.

 

I am my own fiercest competitor, my harshest judge, the first one to notice when I have climbed too high and fallen. The battle of the five of wands weaves itself in and out my mind and my environs. It is a clownish battle. The one who cares most about the result is my self. None of this is fun. My conflict is not fun. I wanted to illustrate the fun cards first.

 

The cards in this deck are strewn with symbols that are truly occult, from the Latin word occultus: clandestine, hidden, secret. They are occult because the artist chose not to publish a book pointing out the meaning of all the hidden symbols in his work. Curses upon him! This leaves it up to us, the readers, to divine what his symbols mean.

 

Ultimately, symbols in a work of art take on the meaning that the we, the viewers, give them. If we are unable to relate to anything in an image (or a story or a poem or a life), we pass it by. If some one tells us, “Look at thisβ€” look at thisβ€”” we are more likely to stop and look and relate and say, “I see!”

 

Dare I askβ€” Am I the woman in the green dress: about to step on a rake and smack my head? Have I fallen off a mountain? Am I climbing a tree with a cudgel too large in pursuit of an animal that has already fled?

 

In the end, we are all peasants, common people wielding the tools of our trade in argument. If any of our weapons should break, we will be unable to work. What are we arguing about? Is anyone listening to anyone else? Are we even listening to our selves?

Saturday, December 10th, 2011

Five of Swords β€” Tarot of a Moon Garden

Artist: Karen Marie Sweikhardt

 

Interpretation: “Divinatory Meanings: Conquest. Defeat. Destruction of others. Degradation. Adversary may arise. Revocation. Infamy. Dishonor. Reverse meanings: Uncertain outlook. Chance of loss or defeat. Weakness. Possible misfortune befalling a friend.”

 

I’ve got a cold. Invading armies of germs see my immune system is down and break through the weakened fortress, multiplying by the billions. I defend with copious amounts of snot. My throat is raw. My head aches. Perhaps I will try to burn them out with fever.

 

In the Tarot of a Moon Garden, swords are represented by the dragonfly’s abdomen. When mating, male dragonflies embrace females with spiny claspers in a vise-like grip that often leaves the female with gouged eyes, a punctured exoskeleton, and a split head. A male dragonfly uses his spoon-like and sometimes spiky penis not just to transfer sperm to the female, but also to scrape out rival sperm from previous matings. Sexual conquest at its finest.

 

Every conquest involves a defeat. Sometimes it is difficult to ascertain whether I am the one with a hollow victory or the defeated person or the one who gave up preemptively. This card may mean any of those, depending on the situation and how one chooses to view it.

 

My situation: I am in Quebecβ€” my boyfriend’s other homeβ€” where everyone speaks French and I can say “Je ne comprends pas,” but I don’t need to, because it’s obvious I don’t understand. His son is 10 and, aside from having the normal why-does-Papa-have-to-bring-his-girlfriend response to my visits, he also gets to be especially annoyed that I am a complete idiot in French.

 

In any good relationship, there is no grand conquest or defeat, just a thousand little things we have to put up with in each other. If any of us choose to battle, there will be victory and there will be defeat and there will be degradation and there will be adversary. We choose when to battle and when to avoid conflict. Perhaps the five of swords can be a reminder to remain peaceful.

Friday, December 9th, 2011

Five of Cups β€” Napo Tarot

Created by Betty Lopez; Designed by Napo

 

Interpretation: “Frustration prevents one from seeing the cups brimming with happiness. The three amphoras pour out illusions and bring dejection and melancholy. Disillusionment. Disappointment.”

 

An amphora is a wheel-thrown terracotta container used to store liquid. If these amphoras are pouring out illusions, he must have thought his cargo was more precious than he found it to be upon spilling. Or perhaps it was very precious liquid indeed, and he was under the impression he would be able to manage it without spilling.

 

I just drew a five of cups two days ago. Am I disappointed and frustrated, as this card suggests? (possibly) Am I lying by not letting on how disappointed and frustrated I actually am? (possibly)

 

I thought I was going to be able to work through most of this pregnancy, but about a month and a half ago I got fired for pregnancy-induced-moodiness. Plus, my boss was an unappreciative jerk. I thought I was going to be able to be more active than I am, but five days ago I woke up with a pain in my neck so acute I went to see a chiropractor for the first time in my life. So, yeah, I’m frustrated and disappointed, but I don’t think my illusions were that great. Not most of them. The illusion that the chiropractor might actually help was briefly large and wonderful. But nothing truly terrible and irredeemable has happened to me. Despite some long hours spent dwelling in the pits of despair, it’s actually been quite good. I think it is important to spend a moment (but not too many moments) looking at what is lost before picking up and moving on. Things that are truly lost cannot be had again.

 

The act of loosing something is an act of presence. Once something is lost, the thing lost is in the past and the present has moved to another moment. It is important to keep up with the presentβ€” not in terms of the cut of our jeans or the operating system on our computersβ€” but with our minds. If our minds are constantly elsewhere, then nothing will ever happen in the present. Nothing as good as what did happen or what could happen can happen now if the mind is not present.

 

Look at what spilled. Turn around. Look at what remains. Take this. Move on.

 

Thursday, December 8th, 2011

The Star β€” Tarot Lukumi

Artist: Luigi Scapini
Author: Emanuele Coltro Guidi
 
Interpretation: “The stars are so far that they don’t listen to anyone. The path (avatar) of Yemaya, Yoruban Goddess of the sea, called Asesu is a deaf Entity. Yemaya Asesu goes on with her business and doesn’t listen to much. The patiki tell us that before listening to questions she counts all the feathers of a duck who was sacrificed as ebbo to her.”
 
Part of the purpose of the Tarot Lukumi deck is to build a bridge between the world of Cuban Santera (Relga de Ocha or Relga Lukumi) and the occult tarot to demonstrate universality of the rules of Magic. I am especially fond of this purpose.
 
Throughout the history of the occult tarot, different readers have used their preferred method of magic to divine meaning from the cards: Astrology, Kabbalah, Masonic Hermetism, Jungian psychology, and so on. In order to find meaning in a foreign system, one must find the correspondences with an understood system. This is the basis of syncretism. It is also the basis of learning to love one’s neighbor as one’s self.
 
Santeria is an anamistic religion coming from the syncretism of the religion of the west-African Yoruban tribes people and Catholicism. Following their abduction to the Indies for the purpose of slavery, Spanish law mandated that these people be baptized Roman Catholic. But Catholicism was not a big hit among the slaves. [If someone abducted me from my homeland; placed me on a ship in a manner similar to which I do not approve of cattle being treated; left me there for weeks with minimal life support on a nauseating ocean voyage; separated me from my family & sold my children & subjected me to a life of forced labor I, too, would have trouble accepting their notions of god.] In attempt to appease their tormentors, many slaves pretended they were Catholic. Thus began the syncretism of Yoruba and Catholicism into Santeria.
 
The Star, in this image, is pictured as a mermaid sitting on a sandbar pouring water from two conch shells into the sea. Behind her is the sacrificial duck whose feathers she counts before listening to questions. In the sky are seven stars.
 
I learned the star as a card of hope, and when I think of hope, I think of Pandora. In Greek mythology, Prometheus, champion of mankind and traitor to the gods, stole fire from heaven. Zeus punished Prometheus by binding him to a rock. A great eagle ate his liver every day; the liver grew back and was eaten again the next.
 
The gods, still bitter that Prometheus had given the gift of fire to man, then took vengeance on humankind by means of Pandora, the first mortal woman. Pandora was endowed with every gift known to women: beauty, grace and desire from Aphrodite; cunning and boldness from Hermes; gardening msp free vip codes from Demeter; manual dexterity and spinning from Athena; sweet singing and lyre playing from Apollo; and a pearl necklace from the god of the sea who promised she would never drown.
 
The gods then placed every plague and sorrow into one jar and presented the jar to Pandora with the instructions do not open under any circumstance. Pandora was then presented as a gift to Prometheus’ brother.
 
So of course Pandora, endowed with an ample amount of curiosity, opened the jar. Out poured Death, Sickness, Insanity, Pestilence, Addiction, Greed, Theft, Lies, Jealousy and Famine and on and on until all the evils were loosed upon the earth. Then out the bottom, just before she managed to slam the lid, flew Hope. It is Hope that sustains humanity.
 
Anyone who calls on a deaf goddess who counts all the feathers of a duck before listening to a question really has run out of places to turn for help. It is when we feel most alone and lost that we need to call on hope the most.
 
Shining, shining in the basket’s bottom,
a jewel of hope lies beneath
the monsters of destruction.

Wednesday, December 7th, 2011

Five of Cups β€” Tarot Piatnik Wien

Rudolph Pointner[I apologize in advance if these next few months turn out to be a blog of my pregnancy as revealed through the tarot deck, but we pregnant woman seem to be preoccupied with our own pregnancies.]

 

Artist: Rudolph Pointner

 

The interpretive book for this deck (a little white booklet commonly called the LWB) says very little about the individual cards, especially the minors. It has a something to say on cups in general, tho:

 

“When we have treated the Swords as a symbol of masculinity, it suggests itself to consider the cups decidedly as of a feminine character. The cup, the jug or the goblet are seen as receptacles, for receiving and holding. Often are they associated with feeling and emotion. The emptying of the two jugs on card No. XVII of the major Arcana [The Stars] means nothing else but the detachment from all sentimental bonds. // The cup as it contains fluids logically is matched with the element of water, and its celestial region is the north. // From the religious viewpoint the cup is often identified with the symbolic goblet held by Christ, or with the Holy Grail, the vessel containing Christ’s blood.”

 

Under divinatory meanings, this LWB says of this card upright, simply, “respect gained.” Reversed, “Unpopularity.” I am reading upright. I generally read the 5 of Cups as a period of change, where one need take special care to pay attention not only to the negative qualities, as can be easy, but to the positive aspects of the situation. Paying attention to the positive aspects during difficult time of change gains respect.

 

The greatest change going on in my life is that I am busy gestating. I put this off for so long (I’m 38!) because before, I could only focus on the negative aspects of having a child. There was a lot I wanted to do. I worked as little as clash royale cheats no survey possible and kept my bills low.

 

I traveled around Central America. I spent a year bicycling around the country. I traveled to the high arctic. I swam for hours on end out in the open ocean. I did things to see what it was like to do them and went to extremes. I played. And the beauties that I saw were incomparable.

 

At age 28 I decided I needed a profession. I learned to climb trees and became an excellent arborist: a good game. Still, I lived simply, somewhat selfishly, and generally alone.

 

Eventually I realized I needed to practice commitment. At age 36 I “bought” a house. [I will actually own the house at age 66.] A year later, I decided to fall in love and found a suitable candidate. A year later he moved in and I came down with sudden-onset-baby-desire syndrome. I realized, in the most honest sense of the word, I had nothing better to do. Having a child was the best thing. I have left behind the things I used to think were better.

 

I am surprised to gain respect from my friends who have children. My women-friends are wonderful mothers. I’ve always looked at them and their devotion to their children and thought, “I could never do that.” Now I am ready to try.

Female-self as vessel. Womanly respect gained.

Ever-child self and endless child-wonders left behind. Embody motherhood.

Tuesday, December 6th, 2011

Ace of Cups β€” The Fantasy Showcase Tarot

C. Lee Healey[Although I’ve had this deck for a number of years, I’ve always been afraid to shuffle it in fear that I would thereafter never be able to tell what many of the cards are. Now it’s shuffled.]

 

Artist: C. Lee Healey

 

Interpretation: “Great love; fertility; bounty; productiveness.”

 

Ace of cups. To be full of love. The greatest love one can offer out is true love of one’s self. How can one truly love others if one does not love one’s self?

 

I am pregnant by means of love, showing my fertility, the bounty of which should be a child in another four months’ time, demonstrating my (re)productiveness. In order to best love my child, I need to act with love toward myself.

 

Last night I dreamed I was a fuzzy little winged-creature of the soaring (not flapping) type. I was clinging to the edge of a precipice with a strong updraft. I wondered, if I spread my wings and leapt and soared just right, could I go outward, round a small promontory in the cliff face, and land once more clinging to the vertical stone on the other side? My friends encouraged me. I leapt and plummeted down, down, with the cliff face shooting up before me as I fell faster and faster, the wind whipping through my wings at breakneck speed and the darkness ever deepening. It was a significant moment before I realized I needed to learn to flap if I was ever going to return to the cliff. I flapped as hard as I could, my body seeming heavier each moment, my forward movement barely negligible, my downward movement reaching terminal velocity.

 

Thus was the dream.

 

What impressed me about the dream is that I didn’t panic. Panicking would have been a waste of time. I thought only for a moment that, by the time I returned to the cliff face, I would have to climb upwards thousands of feet out of the darkness. There is no how to view private instagram profiles without following no survey point in worrying about the scarcity of handholds or the integrity of the rock or the height of a climb on a cliff face I might never reach.

 

Moral: Take care of the present, and the future will take care of itself.

Sunday, December 4th, 2011

Tarot of the Absurd

Infant's Feet

My feetβ€” long ago.

The goals of this blog are to create a daily entry about a one-card tarot reading in order to facilitate the writing of a book at the end of 78 weeks’ time.

 

Six days a week I will read a card from a different tarot deck. One day a week I will pick a random card from my deck and write about that.

 

(Unless I don’t.)

 

For the purpose of this blog I have chosen four suits,Β  corresponding to the suits as I have named them for my deck. Other names are as follows:

 

cupsβ€” AKAβ€” hearts, chalices
coinsβ€” AKAβ€” pentacles, diamonds, money, oro
sticksβ€” AKAβ€” staves, wands, clubs, rods, batons, sceptres
bladesβ€” AKAβ€” swords, spades

 

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